π Get a Job at UPS: Stop Lying About Your Reality TV Check, Boo!
Let’s talk real quick. You got eliminated after two episodes on Love Mansion Island: Sexy Singles Edition and now you're selling tummy tea on Instagram with 47 likes. Baby… it's time. Get a job at UPS.
I said what I said.
π§ "Reality TV Star" or "Still Living with Ya Mama"?
Listen, I’m not hating. I watched your season. You were cute in the villa, crying in the confessional, falling in love after 3 hours like it was a Disney reboot. But now it’s six months later, you’re beefing with fan pages, posting blurry selfies with “business inquiries” in the bio, and pretending you're booked and busy—meanwhile you can’t even book a barber.
Let’s be clear:
You got a stipend, not a salary.
A shoutout, not a check.
Exposure? Yes. Rent money? Girl, where?
π¦ Meanwhile at UPS...
- Full benefits.
 - $21/hour starting pay.
 - Free uniform—no more Fashion Nova discount codes.
 - You can still wear lashes on the forklift, boo. Ain’t nobody stopping you.
 
Imagine clocking in at 6 a.m., getting those muscles tight from lifting boxes, and actually having a W-2 to file in April instead of crying over affiliate links that made you $3.79.
π The Fans Have Moved On
Let’s be honest: the internet is fickle. One minute you're trending for kissing two cast members on the same night, and the next? We’re all watching the new season with hotter singles, messier drama, and people who actually bring something to the table—besides a sob story and a protein shake.
Meanwhile, you’re live on TikTok at 2 a.m. saying “Don’t worry, projects are coming soon.” Chile, the only project you need is a 401(k).
π€·♀️ UPS Don’t Judge
UPS doesn’t care if you cried over Chad on Episode 3. They don’t care if your followers dropped after your 14-minute apology video. They care if you can show up, be professional, and scan that barcode with confidence.
And guess what? That direct deposit hits every Friday. Not 6 months after reunion filming.
πΌ Reality Check vs. Real Check
We’re not saying give up on your dreams, baby. But build the bag, then chase the brand. UPS ain’t glamorous, but neither is being “formerly on reality TV” and still asking your cousin for $20.
So here’s the truth:
π
 Your 15 minutes? Cute.
π¦ A UPS job? Secure.
π Pretending you’re rich from reality TV? Embarrassing.
Moral of the story? Go ahead and get that job at UPS. Stack that coin, come back for All-Stars, and actually have something to brag about. Because baby, we are tired of the lies—and your “brand deals” with expired promo codes.
Now, who needs a resume template and a work boot coupon?